We're Doing Okay

I've been tired and a little fuzzy the past few days. I'd sit down and try to write something and forget everything I wanted to say.

It's early Thursday morning, Elcie is home and the other two are in school. She had a very restless night complete with bad dreams. I think she finally fell asleep around 4:30. I called her name a couple of times and then let her sleep. The school year is winding town, tests are completed, and she won't miss much.

She's having a rough time dealing with her Grandma Carol's death. Rebecca and Rochelle are doing better. They're sad but they talk about her and what happened. Elcie clams up, keeps everything inside, and then explodes in misdirected anger. Usually at me. The school counselor is talking to her and she'll soon have summer vacation and her arts and crafts summer school. I'll give her a little time and if it doesn't get better, try to find our own grief counselor for her.

I made what I hope was my only trip to the funeral home with my friend Dawn to sign papers and pick up Carol's ashes. We still haven't decided what we'll do with them but there's no hurry. Meantime, they're in a safe place. The girls haven't asked about them lately; when they do, I'll deal with it.

Meantime, life goes on. I still have to go through Carol's things. Maybe this weekend or early next week. My energy level is better, I'm back to actual cooking now, and I get through most days without lying back down. But I look at those boxes and bags we brought back home and put it off one more day.

Tonight is open house at the middle school for all 3 girls. It will be the last one for Elcie who will start high school in the fall.

I just had to go back to my last post and read what I'd said. Told you I was fuzzy.

Older son Jim arrived yesterday. He may have 3 days; he may have almost a week. Somehow the leave schedule at the National Guard became confused (SNAFU?). By now, he'll finally know for sure. I saw his motorcycle parked next to Tim's bike yesterday morning at Barnes & Noble, walked in and hit him on his shaved head with a magazine for not calling me. (He's a 200 pound Army sergeant - hitting him on his hard head didn't cause permanent brain damage). Also made him buy me my cold drink. His brother was almost rolling on the floor laughing at the two of us.
Jim's doing fine but he didn't get here until 3:00 a.m. Just dozed off and a bunch of police cars went by his house, sirens screaming and lights flashing. They must have been taking a shortcut; he's on a quiet street. He fell back asleep a little after 4:00 a.m. to be awakened by Jonathan shortly after 5. No wonder he forgot to call me. I just checked the mileage between El Centro and Merced. 400+ miles on a Harley is a long trip and I fret every time he sets out. That's probably why he never lets me know exactly when he's leaving. Of course that means I fret for a couple of days instead of 8 or 10 hours. As far as I know, they're still planning on moving to Yuma, AZ sometime this summer. His Guard assignment sounds long term and it's so difficult to have his family this far away. Yuma is only 45 miles from El Centro and he likes Arizona. So do I.

Oh, Jonathan turned one year old yesterday so at least Jim made it home for the birthday if he didn't sleep through it.

I told him Yuma has huge flying beetles and cockroaches (they fly too) as well as scorpions and rattlesnakes. He was not deterred. I remember living in Phoenix and shaking out my shoes every morning and my first sight of those flying critters. All harmless but not something I want buzzing around the house. On the other hand, I loved Phoenix for the year or so I was there and he'll probably like Yuma.

And now I'd better get busy being useful.

Thanks to all for your kindness. Several of you came over from Parent Dish (Blogging Baby) and other sites. I had no way to respond directly.

Have a good weekend if I don't get back here tomorrow and take care everyone.