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Saturday, March 11, 2006

A Little Early (or late) For Me

I've been fading so early lately, I'm afraid if I don't write something now, it won't get done. Thanks to all of you who have inquired and sent prayers and wishes for us. Susie, I'll get back to you about the IEP. I hadn't forgotten.

I wish I had better news to report. He's been moved from a regular room to what they call the "Step-Down" Unit. It's a classification between routine and critical care. I got over there this morning after our regular Saturday morning brunch and he had been cleaning up and they were helping him change pajamas and making his bed. We couldn't hear each other too well over all the activity so he handed me a sheet of paper about how to live with congestive heart failure. Where did that diagnosis come from? The one thing that has been more or less eliminated was heart problems. The specialist in Modesto had noticed something on the tests they ran and wanted to follow up but by that time he was on his second hospital stay here. The Merced cardiologist had been tracking him as well. Yesterday they were worried about blood clots in his leg but now they say there aren't any. They're letting him out of bed so I take that as a good sign in the midst of all this.

I left as they were wheeling yet another machine into the room. I didn't want to leave my daughter too long to deal with the girls. She's been having some problems with her chemo and tires easily. Her feet are giving her problems as well which is one of the side effects. I'll be glad when she's done with it and we can find out what her prognosis is.

The one bright spot is that everything they suggested on their printout are things we were doing for the most part anyway. Low fat, low sodium, exercise. I'm sure he will be on different medications.

And now you know as much as I know which isn't a lot. I'm trying very hard to hope for the best. In the meantime, my approach is to go on with what I would have been doing anyway.

Two kids are outside playing in the sunshine for however long it will last. My blogging neighbor from down the road, Janice, said they had hail in Madera. It was forecast here and a couple of people at the hospital said we had some. Maybe I slept through it. We had a little thunder in the early afternoon and late evening and there may be more followed by another cold front complete with rain. No snow yet. March has decided to live up to its reputation. L. in San Francisco said her kids were making snowballs from the hail they had there. I'm sitting here with two layers of clothing (not including undergarments) and about to find a blanket for my legs. The girls don't seem to notice but I'm cold.

I cooked enough yesterday so dinner can be reheated with no problem. I'll deal with tomorrow when it gets here. Church probably and then just my usual stuff. I don't know when he will be home so I can't do a lot of planning. He had thought at first the weekend but with this latest bit of information I'm not so sure.

Sometime I'm going to write the whole story of his illness and the indifference of the bureaucracy. I'm convinced a lot of what we've been going through would have been avoidable if anyone four years ago had believed us when we said he was sick. Not now though - later.

I have now spoken on the phone with two friends I had met only through our respective blogs and email. It's so nice to hear a voice.

Elcie is enjoying being 13. She's our only teenager and she lost no time in reminding her sisters. Their response? "Whatever". I'm not fond of that word but I still had to giggle when I heard it. As long as it's not directed at me, they can "whatever" each other all they want. They'll outgrow it, I hope.

Spoke too soon.

Just left to referee a squabble, brought both girls in and sent them to separate corners. That made Elcie unhappy because they were invading her living room space. Too bad. She is now thinking about it in her room. Thirteen is not a license to scream at her sisters.

Don't miss the post below this one. I have a recipe for not just any old macaroni and cheese but a recipe from Trinidad.

Talk to you later.


Anvilcloud said...

I hope that these medical problems get sorted. It's nerve-wracking when nobody can seem to figure out what's going on.

MsSisyphus said...

Ann, sorry things are rough. I'm confident you'll sail through with your usual dignity and aplomb.

My Gramma lived for close to 20 years with congestive heart failure. And when I say "lived" I mean lived a life, not "continued to be medically classifiable as living." So this is not some terrible sentence for Ray. Not the news you want to hear, for sure, but not the most dire thing ever, either.

In my prayers.

Andrea said...

Ahhh granny, I really whish there was something that I could do to help. Wish I had a magic wand that could make all this craziness go away.
You are tired and cold because you are obviously stressed. Listen to your body and sleep. Dont forget to look after yourself in all this craziness.

Thinking of you often, hugs hugs hugs hugs hugs.

ipodmomma said...

will talk to you soon... :))))

prayers and much love for Ray and you all...

Beth said...

How frustrating not to know what's going on! Still hoping for you and Ray.

Janice said...

Hi Ann,

My Aunt Dean died of congestive heart failure ten years after she got the dianoises. She lived most of that time alone in her own home and with dignity, until the last year or so of her life. Then she sorta faded.

We just got the word my Mother-in-law was slowing down alot! She's in her 80's and has a bad heart for over 20 years now. She lives in her own home with her only unmarried son(failure to launch?) And my husband's little sister has ordered him to--"go visit mom now!"

As bad as congestive heart failure sounds, Ray could have a lot of good years left--decades even.

Hang in here Ann, and I'll pray for you, Ray, and Carol. And Carol's feet.


vicki said...

Hi Ann- since I'm sitting here on my duff, temporarily immobilized by life and death, and very appreciative of your visits and today's comment I came by to thank you. And then I figured I better actually put all of your characters in place in my mind. So, I did the archive thing and now I think I understand who's who. More importantly I understand who's you. What a full plate you have- and all the food "touches." Good thing you are aging with flexibility, love and charity.

Take care of yourself- it's the number one rule to caring for others. Thank you for your kind friendship.

thordora said...

Cruddy. I'm always scared when I feel off that I'll ignore it and it will come back to bite me. This is a reminder why I need to be more of a jerk with my doctor (bless canadian medicare!)

Hang in there. Like I told my daughter today, you wouldn't enjoy the sunshine if it never rained.

Gawdessness said...

Too much on your plate but it sounds like you are doing what you do so well and carrying on.
I am sorry that you are having all these things at once especially when I would wish none of it on you at all.
Thinking good thoughts and sending prayers of getting well to you and yours.
Will try and check in as much as possible.
Missing reading you on a daily basis!
BTW We have snow, snow, snow where I live.

tAnYeTTa said...

Prayers are being sent your way. We had hail today too!

tAnYeTTa said...

the teenage years!!!!!!! oh the joy. I have a teenager in the house and the part about you hoping it will only get better, well....ummmm....oh never mind, you know the rest. LOL